Advice for Men whose loved one is struggling with vaginismus

painful sexOver the years, I have been impressed with the amazing support men are capable of giving their loved ones who struggle with vaginismus. I also feel that it is also important to acknowledge that the impact of vaginismus on the man is severe and that the man often feels the same isolation, frustration, confusion, rejection, anger and guilt that the woman feels. I receive emails from men describing their pain. They love their honey but have frustrations of not being able to consummate. It is especially the long term problems that tear at me. The fidelity that these men have is true also of the many couples I treat. These are the men who hang in no matter how miserable they might be.

Now is the time for Men to Join Vaginismus MD Forum

VaginismusMD ForumIf you are a male partner of a woman suffering from vaginismus reading this blog, please join our VaginismusMD Forum and become active in our “Vaginismus For The Men” category. We get little participation in contrast to the woman’s section and I feel there are several reasons for this. For one, men generally don’t like to share this type of feeling/communication and don’t share this with their closest friends. Another reason would be that they don’t want their partners to know how they feel. They know their honey is struggling, and they don’t want to add to the difficulties.

Since it is encouraged for all posts to be anonymous, so too can a man remain completely anonymous. The details of the length of marriage can be altered and specific circumstances can be altered. In the end it is the private feelings that are so important, and where these men could use the advice of others.

As noted in the introduction to the Vaginismus MD Forum:

The vaginismus forum is a place to introduce yourself, share your personal story, ask questions, and discuss ALL aspects of vaginismus and the treatment program. Do not be afraid to join our vaginismus forum and become an active member. This is a very friendly, safe, and most importantly “private” forum.

I have a number of professional contacts that I can send copies of the Forum posts to when I feel they can make a contribution. I would love to hear from other men and women to give guidance to these men who are crying for help, yet have no place to go.

Communication for vaginismus

Communication is Key to Overcoming Vaginismus

When both partners have a chance to express themselves to others and to each other, there is a much higher rate of success in overcoming vaginismus. Many couples find themselves closer to each other, have improved communication skills and do not take their sexual relationship or partner for granted once they overcome vaginismus together.

Contact Us

If you have any questions about our Botox treatment for vaginismus and progressive dilation under anesthesia, please contact us via our contact us form.

Dr. Pacik

About Dr. Pacik

Peter Pacik, MD, FACS is a recognized pioneer in treating patients with Botox for vaginismus and the author of When Sex Seems Impossible: Stories of Vaginismus and How You Can Achieve Intimacy. He has been in practice for over thirty years and belongs to a small group of prestigious surgeons who are double board certified by both the American Board of Surgery and the American Board of Plastic Surgery. In 2010, Dr. Pacik received FDA approval to continue his study to treat vaginismus using intravaginal injections of Botox together with progressive dilation under anesthesia.
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