The following blog was written by “Heather” the moderator of our VaginismusMD Forum
Hi ladies. This past week, we reached a milestone as there are now over 500 Forum members and more continue to join every day. Congratulations to Dr. Pacik and Janet Pacik and thank you for creating the VaginismusMD Forum for us as it finally gives us a place to discuss all aspects of vaginismus openly and to no longer suffer with it in silence.
Dr. Pacik writes: “The Forum stands for many things. It allows women to realize they are not alone and they don’t need to live in silence. It gives them a voice. It creates a sense of community with everyone sharing their thoughts and ideas. By reading what others write it gives definition to one’s own feelings. Sometimes it’s too hard to figure it out, but when someone else writes something that makes sense, it can become an epiphany! I learned what vaginismus really means, not from the scientific literature, but from the stories my patients told me.”
He further writes: “The Vaginismus MD Forum currently consists of a vocal group of NOW 500+ who participate in commenting on topics ranging from vaginismus causes to vaginismus diagnosis, vaginismus symptoms, vaginismus treatment, dilator therapy, progression to intercourse, vaginismus cure, vaginismus pregnancy, lubricants, vaginismus aids and all topics related to vaginismus. As of January 2014 with over 260 patients treated and over 300 women who have sent in their questionnaires for evaluation, more than 90% of women go on to normal pain free intercourse with no need for repeat injections of Botox. Many of these women have participated in almost 4000 posts on the Forum covering over 700 topics! In this way the VaginismusMD.com Forum has become a powerful educational tool for all topics related to vaginismus.”
Janet Pacik writes: “Whether painful or impossible intercourse was recently discovered, or like Heather who struggled for 15 years and Nakitalab who struggled for 31 years, both were able to achieve their goals. There is a common thread of feeling like a “freak” and that you are the only one suffering from this condition. Who do you speak to about this? Do you open up to friends and family? When are you going to start a family? These are all the emotions that tear at us day in and day out. Yet it is not necessary to travel this path alone. Any woman who has been treated for vaginismus knows the importance of supporting others. The outpouring of support from the ladies who have conquered vaginismus constantly amazes me. Please remember that you are not alone and that there are many who will support you both on the VaginismusMD Forum and myself personally with emails and phone calls.
Nakitalab: “This Forum has been such a blessing to me in so many ways. Being able to read, share my challenges, successes and receive invaluable advice from others has been a huge part of my healing process. For over 30+ years I felt so humiliated and alone. All of these years of suffering in silence; too afraid and humiliated to talk to anyone about what I was going through. But the VaginismusMD Forum has given all of us a voice. We aren’t alone anymore! We can share our ups and downs. To me, this has been a huge part of my road to healing!”
Allie: “This forum has been a HUGE help to me as I get to read your posts about your struggles and many of your success stories. It has been very encouraging. Just like many of you, I spent many years in silence, so this forum has helped me in so many ways.”
And, I personally have benefitted so much from the creation of the VaginismusMD Forum:
I think an invaluable aspect of Dr. Pacik’s Botox Treatment Program is the opportunity to write our own individual stories and speak to each other in an anonymous Forum about all aspects of vaginismus, something that is often a “secret” in many of our lives and was in my own life for several years while suffering with it. I was too embarrassed to tell anyone except my husband and could not even share this with my best friend. I would like to encourage all of you reading this who may feel the same way to please know you are not alone anymore and have this Forum as a wonderful avenue to express yourself and talk about this condition openly (albeit private and anonymously).
The word “catharsis” originates from the Greek language and means to cleanse or purge. Writing your feelings allows you to air them (albeit privately) and so, rather than pushing these feelings down inside yourself, clogging your emotional being with pent up frustrations, fears, and doubts, you acknowledge them. And in so doing, you honor yourself. On this Forum, if you read through the Introduction Stories, so many members share that they feel this “catharsis” after sharing their stories and emotions surrounding vaginismus. I look forward to reading your posts and am here to support each and every one of you.