How Long Should Sex Last

When my patients are able to achieve intercourse, many of them want to know how long should sex last?

Dr. Irwin Goldstein, editor of the Journal of Sexual Medicine, cited a four-week study of 1,500 couples in 2005 that found the median time for sexual intercourse was 7.3 minutes. In the May 2008 Journal of Sexual Medicine, a survey of 34 members of the Society for Sex Therapy and Research in the United States and Canada concluded the optimal amount of time for sexual intercourse was 3 to 13 minutes (does not include foreplay) with the following breakdown:

  • “Too Short” 1 to 2 minutes
  • “Adequate” 3 to 7 minutes
  • “Desirable” 7 to 13 minutes
  • “Too Long” 10 to 30 minutes

For our treated vaginismus patients, goal is to have pain-free and enjoyable intercourse

Our patient’s first sexual experiences after Botox treatment may tend to be more “clinical” and then with time becomes more spontaneous, romantic and exciting. Foreplay is important and whenever possible, should be included in your sexual experiences. Foreplay is the emotional and physical intimate acts meant to create sexual desire for sexual activity and sexual arousal. Foreplay lowers inhibitions and increases emotional intimacy. It builds confidence and trust. It is important to talk honestly with your partner from time to time to find out what kind of foreplay is desired. Find out which areas of touch are exciting and experiment with toys. Be open to new experiences.

How long should sex last, simultaneous climax & vaginal orgasm

It is important to remember that length of time of actual sex is not an indication of “great sex”. Simultaneous climax is fairly rare and is not an indication of “great sex”. Vaginal orgasm is achieved by only about 30% of the population, and this too is not an indication of “great sex”.

The brain is women’s largest erogenous zone

What’s more important than length of time of actual sex is your attitude towards sex. If you start with the right mindset, you’re going to learn pretty quickly what works for you and your partner. Great sex will surely follow. Developing a sexual closeness between you and your partner will last a lifetime!

Another Great Blog on Great Sex after Vaginismus Treatment!

Please visit the Blog Section on our VaginismusMD website for another great blog on “Great Sex After Vaginismus Treatment”.

Contact Us for More Information

For confidential personalized information and advice for Botox treatment for vaginismus and progressive dilation under anesthesia, please contact us via our contact us form.

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About Dr. Pacik

Peter Pacik, MD, FACS is a recognized pioneer in treating patients with Botox for vaginismus and the author of When Sex Seems Impossible: Stories of Vaginismus and How You Can Achieve Intimacy. He has been in practice for over thirty years and belongs to a small group of prestigious surgeons who are double board certified by both the American Board of Surgery and the American Board of Plastic Surgery. In 2010, Dr. Pacik received FDA approval to continue his study to treat vaginismus using intravaginal injections of Botox together with progressive dilation under anesthesia.
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